I'm DONE!!

Okay, For all the people who stuck behind me and thought i could do this, i'm sorry.. For myself... I'm sorry...

I was only kidding myself in telling myself and everyone that i was doing this for me. Truth was my husband never wanted anything to do with me and i had convinced myself that if i could just look better and prove to him i could do it it might change things..

Today we actually had the opportunity to go and and have fun together.. Kids are spending the night at their big sisters house so we had all night to spend time together. Met around 6, went out to eat, and left at around eight o'clock... He headed home.. Didn't want to go do anything else.. Didn't plan on us doing anything together at home.. told me i could go pick up the kids if i wanted to.

Okay, i love this man with all my heart.. he is a wonderful person and a great dad... For the most part treats me really well, he is just emotionally empty towards me.. Never talks, never touches, never kisses, etc.

After tonight and crying for the past two hours i decided i just don't care.. I will still eat better, drink more water, and exercise some for myself, but i'm not trying anymore.. It's not worth it.

Karilynn... ur an amazing support system and i love you for being there.. i'm sorry i'm quitting on you.

I read all these stories from you guys and see how hard your working and some of you.. how much your husbands are showing you support and i am SOOOOO proud of you all.. you are doing so awesome and i hope you guys rock this month. I'll probably still do the weigh ins just so i can say i didn't walk out on the competition but i'm not expecting anything.. Love you guys oodles...

nov weigh in

Well I guess I'm still in which really shocks me but I'm thrilled. I'm so close to being out of the 220s I can almost taste it. I will be by next wkend. Can't wait to see how everyone else has done! As with last time I can't upload a pic on here but it did get emailed to melissa. My weight this month was....

221.6

Almost 5 lbs!!!